1. Set up a bank account
2. Set up a paypal account
3. Order stuff for the pop up shop
4. Open said pop up shop
5. Achieve these things before I lose the will to live (days are numbered folks!)
Ahh the bank account, a simple yet tedious activity you would think. However what we failed to do was realise that it couldn’t be done online, we needed to kill my slow printer through reams of 15 page documents and then blindly ignore
the last page where for the 5th time it said ‘will all Directors sign here’what??? Again?? What possible reason did it need our signatures for that many times – so another quick trip around the Directors to say, really sorry forgot to get you to sign this page. And then we had several attempts because by this time we were so word blind and unable to grasp that
where it said ‘Chair’ actually it would be better that she sign, so we printed that page again! And lo it came to pass that we checked again and put it in an envelope and had cake as a reward, hurrah.
So, we thought hurrah that bit’s done on to the next bit. But no, we then need to wait for about 10 envelopes each containing separate pieces of information that create a giant puzzle which, on reflection the PhD students in the physics department may have been better placed to resolve. Again for background context all this time we have a static paypal account receiving membership money that absolutely no-one can access because there is no live bank account to
transfer it to.
So, another envelope arrives – hurrah a bank card. Ring the bank again saying please can I activate the online banking, this time feeling quite smug thinking aha you can’t stop me this time. But, just like the horse in a race they are clearly winning falls at the last hurdle we were yet again stopped – I don’t have the funny little calculator thingy that activates the card. Harumph, so I tried to cheat and fool them. Little did I realise they were already on to my cunning ruse, I had tried to fool their system by using a personal calculator thingy not realising that they have different ones for personal and business banking.
The paypal fiasco was equally interesting. On trying to purchase goods for the shop thinking ooh we have funds let
buy using paypal but they had ways to stop me too. Without a bank account the paypal is not verified so therefore most
companies will not accept it (which is quite sensible really). Paypal kindly pay a tiny amount into your account which, yep you guessed it, I can’t see because I can’t log on to the bank and therefore cannot verify the paypal so yet again cry at the balance sitting there quite happily on top of a big hill that no-one can get to.
So, the moral of the story is just hide your money under the bed! Or get the physics students to deal with the myriad of passwords and layers you need to set up and then feel like an inept contender on MasterMind because you cannot remember which one goes where and after three attempts it says ‘please contact your bank’ which I can’t do because the phone options say‘enter your passcode’ which I don’t have because the online banking isn’t yet activated ... aarrrggghhh!
As for items 3 and 4 on that list, you guessed it they have been ignored and moved straight on to number 5!